Why Your Brand of Unique is Perfect

By:  Amy Carroll, Proverbs 31.org

“Sixty queens there may be, and eighty concubines, and virgins beyond number; but my dove, my perfect one, is unique …” Song of Solomon 6:8-9a (NIV)

I look back at photos of my teenage self with a smile and a shake of my head.

My favorite look was funky. There are pictures of me in costume with a T-shirt held together with safety pins and hair faux-hawked to perfection. Other shots show my penchant for shoes in the colors of the rainbow and a prom dress carefully chosen not to be like anyone else’s. Without shame or fear, I chose what I liked, and I didn’t care if anyone else saw it as a fashion statement or a fiasco. My clothes were a reflection of how I felt about myself — confident and carefree.

When we girls grow into women, however, sometimes we lose confidence and find comparison. Later in my life, there was a phase when I only wanted to be the version of myself that was widely accepted — what everybody else was buying into. I concentrated on blending in, because that seemed like the best way to fit in. I wanted to be the size of other women, to dress like other women, to act like other women. I tried and tried to be just like everyone else, when I’m actually like no one else.

And neither are you!

God is the Creator who made us to enjoy variety, because He loves multiplicity and uniqueness.

Think of this … a utilitarian god would have created just one organism to pollinate flowers. Even though only one is technically needed, our creative, diversity-loving God created over 10 types of organisms including bees, hummingbirds, butterflies and even bats to do the pollinating. Within that group, there are more than 17,000 species of butterflies encompassing every imaginable color, size and shape.

And God was just getting started with the butterflies. When you’re in a crowd today, appreciate the wild beauty of the women around you — straight hair and curly hair. Ebony, mocha, ruddy and ivory skin tones, with every hue between. Wide noses, thin noses and noses turned up at the end like mine. No face or body is the same, because God doesn’t make duplicates.

God created diversity, and He loves diversity. Uniqueness delights our God!

When King Solomon spoke to his love in Scripture, he praised her for being unique in a way that surpassed even queens. Scholars say that these words were written to be a picture of how Jesus, the lover of our soul, sees us individually. Do you hear Him saying to you, “My dove, (fill in your name here), my perfect one is unique …”? (Song of Solomon 6:9a)

I’m not a mass-produced woman, my friend, and neither are you. God labored in hand-crafting each of us, one by one. Perfection as defined by God means that we’re unique. We’re at our closest to perfect when we’re living most fully as the one-of-a-kind woman God made, not when we’re conforming into the sameness the world around us wants to prescribe.

The things that make you different are what make you beautiful. Is it your humor? The gentleness of your spirit? The kindness of your heart? Is it your taste for funky clothes or the way you connect instantly with children? Is it your analytical brain or the music that flows from your fingers? Whatever your special blend is, embrace it.

Let’s live as our most perfectly unique version today. Let’s be our rare, beautiful selves, allowing our creative God to shine His glory through us.